Creating Enough

I feel like I'm in such a good place in my life.  Lately, I've been using the mantra from the Secrets "I am the creator of my experience" when I get stressed out.  I find it empowering to think of life this way.  I still lose it when something outrageous happens with the kids like today I found my almost 2 year old covered in my lipstick, head to toe, and the upholstered chair she was sitting on.  I have my outburst of anger but then it quickly dissipates.

I'm feeling much less interested in my weight.  I officially unsubscribed from WW.  I still think it was a worthwhile experience BUT its really hard for me to keep tabs on my food in that manor.  I have actually taken to not weighing myself at all.  Since I've been reading Secrets its making me think that weight gain/loss, the dreaded number what ever it is, is such a small way to look at things.  My cardiologist told me my weight was fine (despite the fact that my BMI is 27).  So if they tell me I'm healthy why obsess over a number?  I should be thinking of bigger things, like creating happiness or enjoying the happiness that's already around me.  If I live like an unselfish cell like Chopra describes in the book, I'd curb any over eating.  Right? Normally, I'd think this is crazy but I feel like its working.  For now, I'll just enjoy my clothes fitting the way I like (not too tight) and that will be enough.

Feeling, Thinking, Action, Being

More notes from the Book of Secrets by Deepak Chopra...


What you seek you already are.


Feeling  points the way when ever you experience and express love.  Love of self and family merge into love of humanity.

Thinking points the way when your mind stops being restless.  You silence your internal dialogue in order to find clarity and stillness.  Clarity for your mind to see it does not have to be so driven.  Thinking -->Knowledge-->Wisdom (personal questions fade)

Action Whenever you surrender by acting selflessly.  At beginning it is inescapable that you will be acting for yourself because, even if you try to be completely selfless, you will be earning self satisfaction.  In time action detaches from ego.  Doing becomes motivated by an outside force - Dharma


Being when ever you cultivate a self beyond ego.

Achilles Tendonitis Update

Ran an easy 4 miles yesterday and then iced my ankles. I felt good during the run but started to feel a slight pain during mile 3. Looked back at my splits and sure enough that was my fastest mile at 8:34. I'm guessing this is an intensity issue.

Nonetheless I am happy with the improvement I'm feeling from icing so I will continue to do so. Today I decided to do my long run of 7 miles since it wasn't crazy hot. It actually rained as in downpour during the run which was sort of heavenly in a refreshing but squishy sneaker sort of way.

Rest, More Important Than One Realizes

17th in my age group out of over 100 women! Feeling very happy with my effort, finished 5 miles in just over 42 minutes.  The course was certified 5 miles and yet my GPS measured 5.25 miles, must investigate.  I think this is a common issue with devices.  I was hopeful for my 40 minute goal when I saw my pace was in the low 8 minute range but the actual pace was more like 8:30.  Despite this, I'm happy because I really feel like I pushed myself to go a little harder than normal and I definitely did.

I ran an easy 3 miles the next day to complete week 4 of training!  My left ankle/heel was bothering me though.  I read about what this could be and I think its achilles tendonitis.  Rest and ice are the only things to do for it.  Rest is easy on vacation which I am.  I found an old Hal Higdon book about marathon training and just read about how rest is more important than most runners realize.  Hopefully after 3 days of rest, I'll be OK for todays's 4 mile easy run. Bring on Week 5!!

On Your Mark, Get Set, Go!

I signed up for a 5 mile race on Saturday.  I'm kind of excited for it.  My times have been pretty amazing for me.  I do think my GPS is screwing something up or maybe I should be trying out for the olympics.  I think its more likely a GPS issue.  Anyway, my pace (I think) has been in the low eight minute/mile range.  

I did a 4 mile race a month ago but I was not prepared for it.  I haven't done a shorter distance and been prepared in a long while.  Last week I ran 5 miles in under 40 minutes according to my phone but mile 4 time was less than 6 minutes which I know is not possible for me.  I have run this race before, its flat but very sunny and crowded.  I am hoping to finish as close to 40 minutes as I can.

Creating my Perception

More notes/excerpts from pages 34-36ish of Deepak Chopra's Book of Secrets 


Perception is the world; the world is perception.  The only personal stake worth having is the ability to create freely with full awareness of how reality making works.  Being a creator is more important than the whole world.

Pure Consciousness, because it underlies everything, is pure potential for all creation.  Do I want to be a victim of the 5 senses or a co-creator?  Eventually someone has to ask "Who am I who is doing all this thinking?"  That question leads to pure awareness.  Awareness is all that changes in the journey from separation to one reality.

On the Hunt for Calamine Lotion and Poison Ivy

I'm still itchy but I decided to educate myself on what the heck to look for in my yard that could be some rash inducing plant.  I used this website's tips on identifying poison ivy http://www.electricant.net/projects/poisonivy/

Went outside to look for leaves of three and saw them all over but mostly in my neighbor's yard.

  Leaves of 3 but I'm not so sure.

Leaves of 3 and I'm thinking this is poison ivy.  Do I mention it to my neighbor?

I think this is it and the exact one I may have gotten my rash from because I yanked a bunch of weeds out of this area near my roses.  Its not actually in my yard, so I guess I deserve it.  How my neighbor has not pointed this out to me is beyond me since they know what poison ivy looks like AND its directly in front of their house.  I'm gardening all the time they could just say I saw some and I'm gonna spray it or something, right?

 This is upsetting.  This too looks like poison ivy BUT its in MY garden right underneath 

my elephant ear!

Another view of the same suspect plant, now how to get rid of it?

Another possible poison ivy plant although I can't really tell yet.

Plus I see it in various spots along our fence with the neighbor.  Next google search, how to get rid of poison ivy without killing your plants!

Beware of Gardening

I can't sleep.  I'm too itchy.  I've been itchy for several days actually.  I figured I had poison ivy but I wasn't sure since I've never had it before.  Plus shouldn't it be subsiding by now?  I've been itchy for about 2 weeks and it just seems to be getting worse.  Tonight since I can't go to sleep I googled "itchy red skin rash"  I scared the crap out of myself.  Were there mites somewhere?   Do I have shingles (my grandma had them back in May)?  I had no idea so many things could cause a skin rash.  After more searching and looking at my rash, which is a few tiny blister like bumps on my fingers and then a red rash on my sides, I have self diagnosed myself as having poison oak.  I figure that I weeded it out, hence touching the plant, direct contact is the blisters on my fingers.  I likely rested my hands on my hips/sides and got the toxic itchy stuff on my clothes!  The rash appears in your thicker skin later so it really is getting worse but probably still from the original exposure.  This could last up to 6 weeks!!!  I can think of several suspect plants in the yard most of which are in my neighbor's "garden" (more like weed garden) behind my rose bushes.  I suppose I could say they warned me BUT they could also get it out of their yard.  There is so much irony in the fact that I've been gardening so much to avoid using the computer and then I end up using the computer to diagnose my gardening poison exposure.  I'll ponder that while I itch.

RIP Purple K-Swiss

Falling

During my 3 mile "easy" run on Tuesday I wiped out on the sidewalk. I usually run a different route where I run on the street but in the pursuit of a more shady route I changed it up. As I ran down Main Street, I see an old lady with a cane walking. I was thinking, "I hope I don't scare her by coming up so quickly from behind, poor old lady looks like she can't even turn around." Then splat! Apparently she couldn't turn around because she didn't look to see what the THUD was behind her (thud being the sound my body made hitting the sidewalk). Bloody knees and all I completed my run even though I was injured at 0.5 miles into the run.

I definitely sprained my wrist too. So today I'm walking in my same running sneakers and I fell AGAIN! Reopened the scab on my knee. This time I fell while carrying my 21 month old baby. Took me a little time to check on myself and baby. She was totally fine since I took the brunt of the fall.

I feel really beat up right now. Pretty sure I'm throwing out the sneakers.

How it all fits together

Nature just amazes me when I take the time to admire it.

Everyone is a Creator.

The Book of Secrets by Deepak Chopra is amazing and I'm only 55 pages into the book!  It says right on the cover "Unlocking the hidden dimensions of your life" and I have to say if I can really implement any of the secrets it could be nothing less than opening a new dimension from within.  Only read about 4 of the 15 secrets but I am hopeful that the next 11 will be just as intriguing as the first 4.

Each night I get into bed and try my best to read 5-10 pages.  I have to keep notes.  Deepak uses such interesting examples to discuss things but I don't want to lose sight of the main thought or fact to consider and meditate on.  There are actual exercises in meditation at the end of each chapter but I have not really done those yet.

I will be posting some or all of my notes/quotes from the book that I find interesting or I'm still pondering.

Roughly around page 22...
Everyone is a creator.  The mystery of how it (everyone's own creation/life/reality) meshes together is the very thing that makes people seek spiritual answers.  As creators we generate the good and bad of our experience.